This week, or better yet, these past few weeks, theatre taught me a valuable lesson. One I should have learned ages ago but it didn’t hit home until I just drove back home from rehearsal.
If you follow me on Twitter, you have seen me rant about having to learn a dance for this years play. The thing is, I’m not the world’s best dancer. Not even runner up. I’m passionately bad at dancing and I don’t mind. What I do mind is having to learn dance routines because it takes me so much longer than it takes other people. So I went through various stages of OH MY GOD WHY DO I HAVE TO DO THIS over the past couple of weeks.
What I realised today was, I did it. I learned the thing and I’m actually not half bad at it. Because even if I call myself a dancing dyslexic, the end result usually looks decent. It just doesn’t come naturally to me and I have to work harder to succeed at it.
Not to toot my own horn but I didn’t have to put much effort into school work when I was in high school, and truth be told, I didn’t have to put that much effort into university classes. Sure, the latter were hard work but I also didn’t have to work as much as some of my coursemates. I’ve mostly had it fairly easy.
And this is why I get easily frustrated when things don’t work on try 1 or 2. Sometimes I need try 25 to get it but that doesn’t mean that I suck at it, just that I may not be as gifted in that department and spoiler alert: That’s totally and utterly okay. It’s what makes us human. If I were a robot, I could do everything equally well. And I also had no reason to be proud of myself for, i.e. mastering a dance routine because someone would just program me to do those.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, I need to learn and internalise perseverance. And to not go in my default mood of complaining when something isn’t working right away because (a) that’s annoying and (b)I will make it eventually. I need to give myself permission to fail and maybe take the extra long way to get there. Because it’s okay.