Or: Watching James Bond.
So tonight, as I’m still awake though it’s officially Saturday here now, I’ll refer to it as tonight, I met with 4 friends from school to watch Skyfall. The movie was … ahem…well…an action comedy. I never laughed so much during a James Bond movie. It was like the time I watched Twilight and couldn’t keep myself from laughing during huge parts of the movie. Maybe it’s because Daniel Craig is not my type of Bond. I’m more of a (young) Sean Connery and Pierce Brosnan kinda gal. Also the hot girl got murdered and Judi Dench died which did not make me like this movie anymore. BUT the new Q is hot, at least in my book.
Ok, moving on to why I am writing this post even though I should be sleeping but I know I would be awake for a while either way, moving things over in my head, so why not bore you with them as well?! Right! Two of the friends I went with, I’m still in contact with, chat with them or see them regularly. One of them is the Franz to my Sissi. She is such a lovely person and I hadn’t seen her in a while so it was great to see her again with her boyfriend. Once during a boring PE class, we got fake-married in gym clothes and all. It was a real classy wedding. Instead of rings we exchanged hair-ties.
I could have chatted with her for another 2 hours and we probably wouldn’t have been even close to finished catching up. So, Franz and friend #2 weren’t the problem.
Friends #3 and #4 however are a different deal. I start with #4 since he is kind of a douche. Maybe this will come to bite me in the ass sometime if he ever finds out about this blog but I don’t think so and even if it were the case, I stand by my opinion. He lied to me and my friends in school about a lot of things and as I was young and naive I believed a lot of the stuff until I started uni. He thinks he knows a lot but TBH, he doesn’t. By now I can only spent little time with him or else I would be getting unkind in my choice of words towards him. I just don’t fancy being lied to on purpose. Friend #2 and me have had many conversations on that subject and we have a theory why he behaves that way. It still does’t excuse all those things.
And then there is #3. We were pretty close in grades 12 and 13. We survived physics and math classes together. To me, he was just a nice guy-friend like others until he told me he loved me in grade 13 and I felt awkward with him ever since. I wasn’t interested in him and never will be. We haven’t seen each other in 5 years but today, meeting him again, I still felt weird and I don’t even know why. Of course he had to be the first one to arrive at the cinema as I was early as always. We did some catching up which was easy since we’re both studying to become engineers. He even has a prof I previously had at my university. The world is a village. Other than that we hadn’t had much to talk about and I was happy when the others got there so they could chat and I only needed to fake interest. Well, that sounds unfair. My purpose of meeting them again was mostly out of curiosity but that passed quickly.
Why do I feel so weird when I’m with him? Is this normal? I’m gay for crying out loud, he was and never will be my type. When we said goodbye there was this moment where we were trying to figure out if we should hug or shake hands and it was strange so we did neither and just nodded. Ugh. I feel like I’m making this into more than it is and I probably am but why? Because he was the only one to ever show any romantic interest in me? I’m confused! And I don’t like being confused. Was I weird because I was expecting it to be weird? Am I making it weird? Or is it both of us? And why does it matter as I’ll probably not see him for another 5 years.
At least after writing this down I’ll probably have an easier time falling asleep. If someone could give me an explanation for the awkwardness, feel free to leave a comment. Thank you.